The idea for this story came from a dream that I had while at the beach in North Carolina, in 2013. It was just months after the death of my best friend.
Back up to late December 2011. Angie was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. On the night of her diagnosis, one of the most profound things to ever happen to me spiritually occurred. I was visited by an angel in my dreams. The angel did not look as I thought it would. In fact, the vision was a blurry haze of blue. Imagine having a can of intense royal blue paint, then swirling white paint about in it. That's what I saw. But in the dream, I had no doubt the vision was an angel. I was amazed at it's beauty. I remember trying to touch it, but it remained just out of reach. After several minutes of fascination, I asked the angel to "Go see Angie." What makes this even more incredible to me, is the fact that John watched this dream as it happened. He woke up to my voice saying "Go see Angie", while I was reaching overhead trying to touch something. He said I did this for the longest time.
I told Angie about the story and asked her what she thought. Could it be real? She was quite furious with me for doubting the visitation. We went to the monastery, where I am now and oblate, to visit with one of the sisters, who is a cancer survivor. When we walked into the sitting area of her office, we both stopped in our tracks. The window ledge and panes were covered with blue stained glass angels. Angie looked at me, tilted her head toward the window and smiled.
We spent the next hour, talking to and praying with this sweet sister. One nun, one Church of Christ girl and one Methodist/Church of Christ girl, all joined hands in prayer as the Spirit of God laid gently upon us. Peace was alive in the room.
A bit later, I received another visitation from this vision of blue. This time it revealed to me that it was a feminine personality. It sang to me, in the loveliest voice I've ever heard. The only words I remember are "God is close to the brokenhearted." When I woke the next morning, I sang that phrase to John and asked him to help me remember it. He laughed and said, "I'm familiar with it. You sang it all night, in your sleep."
This line comes from Psalm 34:18 "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted, and saves those who are crushed in spirit."
My blue angel didn't visit again until the June after Angie died, in February. That's where we pick back up at the beach, in North Carolina.
One night, I dreamed this phrase, "A life well lived is a sacred echo." Immediately upon waking, I told it to John, so it wouldn't be lost to the fog that lifts the details of dreams soon after waking. We wrote it down and then he went to his computer to see if that was a phrase I had heard somewhere before, but just didn't remember.
After a long search, we found the words "sacred echo" but not the rest of the phrase. Seems it was an original thought planted in my brain by God, via my blue angel.
This phrase stayed with me. I rolled it around and looked at it from all sides. I even diagrammed the sentence to see how it looked.
Then one night, several months later, in a dream, this book came to me. A blessed way to wrap up all the ideas that had been gifted to me. I got up the next morning and wrote down the ideas. I prayed over them and mulled them, until I felt enough courage to share the idea with John. He thought it was a great idea.
So there it is. The birth of a novel, via my blue angel. Some of you will doubt my visitations and that's okay. Until it happened to me, I would have doubted it too. I even doubted it after it happened to me. The God I serve can use a wee boys lunch to feed thousands, so it shouldn't surprise me that He can use a nobody like me, to tell a story from an angel and my own pain.
This is the hardest work of my life. Each character is one I have birthed via the brain. Each idea has been put in my heart by the Divine, to help tell a story of friendship, loss, grief, recovery and happiness. At it's core, my story is about celebrating a life well lived by living well.
People keep asking me, "How much longer do you think it will take you to finish?" My answer is a simple one. It will take as long as it takes. After working on it a little bit since the early 2014, I've been working on it full time since about June.
Some days I spend, up to my throat, in research. Some days I spend the day, looking at photographs of the main locations in the book and write down every wee thought that comes to mind. Some days I jump out of the bed and write like crazy, trying to get all the details of a dream on paper. Then I look up and realize it's 3 o'clock and I'm still in my pajamas and haven't eaten a bite, brushed my teeth or combed my hair.
But oh my, on a few glorious days, the words flow like a river, surprising me with their depth and emotion. It's then I know my inspiration does not come from any talent of mine, but from the Creator of the universe.
In the midst of all the chaotic writing, each day starts and ends the same. I pray over this work. May the God of love and peace bless these words to bring glory to the Master Healer.
I hope to have it ready to present to one already interested publisher, by the end of the summer. I am planning on attending a writer's conference in the late summer, where I can present the manuscript to 3 other publishers. Then I will be sending query letters to every publisher with an address. I hope to get my book printed via the traditional route, but if no one bites at it, (And that's a strong possibility in the dog eat dog world of publishing) I will look into self publishing.
So there it is. Please help me pray.
*The lovely painting was done for me on my birthday 2013, by my amazingly talented artist friend, Lynn Weatherford. I described my experiences to her and this is what she painted. Brilliant!
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