Bobby-Echo Living

Yesterday one of my dearest, long-time friends had to bury her Daddy.  He was kind, funny, Godly, friendly.  He was just about whatever you would want to be called.  I do not remember ever hearing anyone say anything bad about Bobby. He was a long time preacher, unashamed to proclaim the word of God.  

He loved his family desperately.  There are four athletic children in that family and now athletic grandchildren.  Along with their mom, Bobby was his children's and grandchildren's biggest cheerleader. I would venture to say that he spent as much time on a bleacher as he did in a recliner or a pulpit.  If he had one playing or coaching, he and Nancy were there.

He had the most precious laugh and he laughed a lot. I like those kinds of people.  The world is a little less sweet because there is no longer a Bobby Marks living among us. Amidst the hatefulness of this time in our world, with evil abounding and causing divisions to be even deeper than before, we need more Bobbys in this world; kind people with big hugs and strong faith.

Funerals always put me in a reflective mood.  I always wonder how I will be remembered.  Some say these kinds of thoughts are of no consequence and wasteful because you'll be gone and never know what was said about you. I disagree.  What is said about you is a reflection of the love you shared while on God's big blue planet.  If you were loved and you loved in return, your love will echo through time.

If you've read my first novel you know that the phrase "A life well lived is a sacred echo" is very important in my life and in that book.  When I think of of Bobby he indeed had a life well lived and his sacred echo will reverberate for many years to come.  His love for his family will echo through time.  His love of sports will continue its echo through his children and grandchildren.  His faith will certainly continue its blessed, sacred echo.

So I do wonder whenever I slip into theses reflective moods after a loss, how will I be remembered?  I believe its worth our time to ponder these things.

It Has Made All the Difference

I have never considered myself more superior to anyone.  Perhaps its because I am very aware that my birth defect made me different and I have always wondered if it is the first thing people see in me. But one thing I truly know is the reason I have never felt myself superior to anyone is because I was taught about the love of God from a very early age. I believe and have faith in God's love and I know its has made all the difference.

I cannot grasp that there are people in our past, currently living, or in the future that believe they are personally so superior to other human beings that they deserve more, can prey upon, or even own another person.

I remember watching "Roots" in 1977 when it aired on television as a mini-series.  It horrified me, gave me nightmares, and made my stomach and heart hurt.  At 11 years old, it was the first time I was  confronted with slavery.

A few years ago I discovered through researching my family history that some of my ancestors owned slaves in North Carolina.  It. broke. my .heart.  I had lived in the delusion that my family wasn't like that; that my early American ancestors were surely above doing something so horrid.  But there it was in black and white (no pun intended but certainly profound). I saw the ages of those slaves owned by my ancestors. Some were but little children, likely born into slavery.  I was devastated,  embarrassed, and honestly, I haven't gotten over it and likely never will.

When I expressed this shame to some, their reply was just as embarrassing. "Well, thats just how it was back then."  BUT IT SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN THAT WAY.

I cannot have empathy toward the black race because I will never understand what it is like to be black.  I just can't.  But I can realize the injustices done in the shadow of race and take steps to make my testimony as a non-racist worthy to God's love for me.

To my black friends, I love you with the love of the Lord and praise God that he allowed me to be friends with you.  If I have ever in the past or might in the future do something that offends or angers you, please know it was or will be because of my ignorance on the subject.  Any mistake I make will not be for lack of love and trying.  I am learning.  I will strive to do better. God's love is better than life.  He will comfort you in injustice.  He will lead me to be a better, more understanding friend.  And I'd also like to say that not all white people are racist. Be kind and forgiving to those of us seeking a better relationship with you and learn new ways of life.  We will make mistakes, even as we try.  And I promise more kindness to you. If we can't be anything else, we can be kind.  I pray I never do anything to make you doubt my love for you and how much I value you.

To my white family and friends, We can do better.  As an individual you can make it a goal to learn more about the black experience.  You can read more.  Watch more documentaries and movies on the subject.  Go to the museums that teach on this subject.  Talk to your black friends. Share all of this with your children.  And most importantly open your mind to the fact that you can be wrong.  We need to let go of the idea that we are perfect and expecting perfection from everyone else.  For all have fallen short.  Even me.  Even you.

I hate all this turmoil in our country.  Strife and divisions come from Satan.  He is having a field day with us.  As long as you hate, Satan is winning.  I have taken a stand.  Satan will not win in the life of Kelley Smith.