Being Lonely and Galway City....

It's a Sunday morning. I'm home while my family is at church. It's Thanksgiving weekend and I've been cooped up in my house for days with strep throat.  I've not been able to attend any of the lovely Thanksgiving celebrations that have been going on in our family.  Honestly, I have been lonely.  It's hard not to be lonely when your family is off celebrating and you are in bed with a fever.  But, I wouldn't have wanted them to miss out on the love too.  Sigh....So I'm thankful they went on with the celebrations.  That still doesn't change the fact that it's lonely being left behind. It's one thing to choose to be alone (which I do quite often) and quite another to be left behind.

This morning while they are at church and I'm at home, I've been doing a wee bit of Internet surfing.  I'm lonely for Ireland and Scotland.  When I'm sick I find myself being melancholy for the Celtic lands.  Why? I'm not sure, but it happens just like clockwork every time I'm sick.  I feel that deep pull for the  homelands of my heart and soul.  For me that's Ireland and Scotland. There appears to be a large invisible string attached to my heart on one end and the Celtic lands on the other.  Sometimes the pull is greater than others.  When I'm lonely, sad or sick the pull is very, very strong.  

Our family went to Ireland in 2010, all four of us, my husband and my two sons.  Our last big adventure as a family of four living together in the same household.  My oldest son was a senior in high school at the time, so this trip was important.  We left on the heels of my father-in-law's passing.  In a few months, my oldest moved away to college.  It was a pivotal point in our family's history.

One of our favorite places was Galway City.  It's so Irish in feel, music, color, culture....I have brilliant memories of Galway.  We spent St. Patrick's Day there.  Lots of walking, talking, laughing, shopping and absorbing.  No loneliness there.  Just watching the video below, which is filmed in Galway City Center, my mind is transported back and I feel the air and smell the smells.  A lovely day of Irish madness, surrounded by the people I love the most in this whole wide world.  What is better than that?  Nothing, quite frankly.   

I saw this video a few months ago and it made an impact on me.  But today in my melancholy mood, it has made a deeper impact seeing it for the second time. 
So what is my life's biggest regret? I have so many, but I wish I had none. Perhaps then my biggest life's regret is that I have regrets.  What are my individual regrets?  Here are a few. 

1. That we got married so young without exploring the world as individuals first.  I think that would have made us better people. 

2.  That I've not been the mother I've needed to be.  I look back now and see so many mistakes.  I regret those mistakes.  You can never fix a mistake as a mother.  Those mistakes affect your children forever, even if you have said "I'm sorry."  

3.  I regret not listening to my Grandparents more.  I'd love to listen to them now.  

4.  I regret that I didn't answer the calling to prayer at a younger age. 

5.  I regret not listening more.